Br. Mike George's Talk on "The 7 Myths about Love...Actually!"

The 7 Habits of Highly Unhappy People!

It’s only when we acknowledge that we are 100% responsible for our own happiness that we start to ‘notice’ our actions that create our unhappiness and start to shed the habits that sabotage our contentment and joy. Many of us do not want to accept that their very habits are the cause of their unhappiness. Here are the 7 habits of highly unhappy people: 

Judging: When you judge others you lose your inner peace, the primary ingredient of authentic happiness, on the mental heals of which often come the sentence and the punishment! All together (judgment, sentence and punishment), they make up the package called ‘condemnation’ which is a guaranteed happiness killer! 

Criticising: Criticising is attacking, and somewhere ‘in there’ usually lies anger albeit in a milder form. And when you are angry you are unhappy. Some of us hide criticism behind ‘constructive criticism.’ Any criticism with anger is more often revenge; any criticism with revenge, however gentle, is punishment in disguise; an unhappy habit. 

Complaining: Complaining is endemic in some cultures. Complaining signals the presence of distress and therefore the absence of happiness whereas ‘giving feedback’ and ‘making a request’ ensure that there is no discontentment. Easy theory, but hard to practice, especially if we have been playing that old ‘complaining record’ all our life. 

Blaming: Projecting blame onto someone else is not only a happiness killer but usually a habit to avoid responsibility. It’s driven by the perfect combination of anger and fear and is therefore a painful cry that sounds like, “It’s all your fault”, but which, when decoded, really means, “I have just made my self very unhappy!” 

Arguing: Trying to prove we are right, or attempting to make others right, is usually both a tense and grumpy affair. Neither side is happy in the process, and even if it seems one side has won, any happiness is short lived until the next opportunity to ‘be right’ is craved for and invoked! To argue is to tell the world that we prefer misery to merriment! 

Competing: Most of us have assimilated the belief that competition is good, fun and even joyful. But a glance at the faces of long distance runners, tennis players will show that 99% of the game is played in a state of abject suffering. Occasionally, in the middle of the game or the match, someone will let a little joy slip out, but it doesn’t last long. Competition contains fear by definition, which along with anger, are the sworn enemies of happiness. 

Controlling: Attempting to make others dance to our tune is a demonstration of the belief that others, and not we, are responsible for our happiness. If the truth were realized and lived i.e. that we are each responsible for our own happiness, the world would be a very different planet on which to live. 

These 7 of many habits block the light of sun of happiness from shining through our life. Each habit is embedded in one culture or another and has become acceptable though social collusion, thereby sustaining unhappiness and passing it on to the next generation. 

Action: Identify your habits that cause unhappiness, rate them, shed them, find their positive equivalents and imbibe as your habits. 

Adapted from Mike George’s article, The 7 Habits of Highly Unhappy People! © 2010

The Sound of Silence

If ever there was an oxymoron, it is found in the phrase ‘sound of silence’. This silence is of course the silence ‘within’ the self, and the sound is more like an awareness, a feeling, of power of ones own being. The ‘sound of silence’ can have the profound effect of altering ones perceptions and perspectives of life. 

It is the still and silent core of our being that provides our strength, stability and the ultimate sense of security, much like the foundation of a building that makes it stable and secure on the ground. Just as we return home every day to rest, the central stillness and silence of our being is our spiritual home where we must return to rest, refresh and reinvigorate our spiritual energy. In today’s world, we habitually and constantly text, video-share, make phone calls and exchange emails with thoughts, emotions, experiences and desires, thereby drowning our awareness of still and silent self by these ‘noises’. To feel truly stable and secure, we must stop drowning ourselves and return to stillness and silence. The practice of ‘being in silence’, of consciously emptying our awareness of all forms of noise, is essentially the practice of meditation. Meditation is the foundation of mastering our mind, healing our heart and accessing our conscience. 

A Silent Mind: Self-talk is the incessant mental distractions and noise of all the inner conversations that we have in our heads with ourselves and with others based our identity we created out of our actions, relationships and environment. It’s not difficult to calm your mind and move into a quieter state. Sit in a quiet place and practice being an ‘observer’ of your own thoughts. As soon as you ‘notice’ a ‘train of thought’, come back to your ‘observer’ status. Next, observe the space between your thoughts. It’s small at first but as you continue to be an ‘observer’ of your own thoughts, gradually, the space will expand with silence. That silent space is the silent power of your being; truly knowing your self. 

A Silent Heart: When you know your self, you cease to crave and search outside for love in the form of the attention, acceptance and approval of others. With this awareness, the noise of desire and attachment subsides, emotional upheaval dissolves and the heart returns to its natural quiet radiant state and giving of itself, without prejudice, to all who are present. Sit quietly and watch your feelings. Next, consciously choose to be at peace. Allow any other distracting thoughts and feelings to pass. Return to choosing to ‘feel’ peaceful. Practice with immense patience! Notice that when you are at peace, there is an intention to give, to share, to connect. 

A Silent Conscience: The deepest resource of the self, of the spirit that we are, is an innate awareness of truth, also referred to as ‘conscience’, it is the quiet voice that speaks to us from deep within our being and guides us through our life. Only when the mind is calm and the heart is at peace, are we able to hear this voice and allow its gentle guidance to shape our thoughts and decisions. Sit quietly and calm the mind, allow your peace to fill your heart and place a question before your conscience. And then listen for a response. Once again persistent patience and practice are essential. There will be a response, often when you have stopped wanting it and when you least expect it! It is a window into our wisdom, and it is a state in which we can know how infinitely powerful we are! 

Action: Practice each of the three levels of silent being once every day, all next week. 

Adapted from Mike George’s article, The Sound of Silence© 2010

What is Success for YOU?

For many, success is some form of material achievement in the world, for others, it is recognition and applause, for some others, it is the journey that generates satisfaction of success. Yet others avoid pursuit of success altogether for fear of failure. 

What does success mean to me? 

Is it simply getting an admission to Ivy school, or getting a great job, award won, mountain climbed, target hit, or leaving a legacy behind? 

Whatever you believe “success” to be will have a profound influence on your life. If you were to follow the predominant mindset in the world today then success would likely be measured by acquisition. The more you have the more successful you are. For most of us, the success tends to be context specific such as sporting success or success in business, academics, science, politics, religion, spirituality, etc. 

However, if we don’t contemplate this question deeply then it’s likely we will blindly follow others ideas and measures of success, usually learned in childhood, craved in youth and pursued into our adult years. 

Inner Success 

When we take time out, however, and reflect on what exactly personal success is, we may notice a deepening of our awareness; awareness of our inner success and we may realize that personal success comes in ways that we seldom recognize as signs of success! 

Inner success looks and feels more like the capability than the success and enables us: 

• To act with total honesty and integrity thus generating a clear conscience without which the authentic happiness that we call contentment is impossible. 
• To remain peaceful and stable when all around you are in crisis or chaos. 
• To value what you are more than what you have. 
• To accept full responsibility for all thoughts, feelings, words and actions. 
• To be able to see past the mistakes of others and focus on their inherent strengths. 
• To be able to let go of the past. 
• To give without the desire for anything in return. 

So before you set on the path to contextual success, reflect on what success really means to you. It will of course generate many other questions such as what is the purpose of my life. What do I value? But when it comes to this unique and special journey called life, there is a time when the asking ‘right questions’ is much more important than having the right answers. 

Question: What does success mean to you? 

Reflection: Why do you think your definition of success might be challenging to achieve (scribble some notes to yourself) 

Action: Initiate a conversation sometime this week with friends, family or colleagues and ask them what success means to them.  

Adapted from Mike George’s article “What is Success for YOU?” © 2012

Awaken Inner Powers and Experience Godly Protection

What Are YOU Worth?

During the last two decades the concepts of self-worth and self-esteem have exploded onto the landscape of personal development with a flurry of books, courses, experts and opportunities promising to repair, restore and improve them. 

Most people value family, friends and their health. Relationships with family and friends allow people to give and receive love and good health gives them peace. What people really want is peace & love which in turn give them contentment that brings happiness. These are human assets that create highest levels of vibrations within our consciousness. 

And yet there appears to be a conspiracy to confuse! We grow up learning to measure our worth in quantifiable terms such as the amount of money we earn, the size of our home, our position at work or the car we drive; we all seem to learn to build our sense of self-worth and self-esteem around ‘things’.

What we seldom notice is how we sustain these illusions about our self-worth and self-esteem and then, through our behaviors and conversations, pass them on to the next generation. At the heart of almost all these illusions of worth and esteem is one fundamental confusion; we mistake our net-worth for our self-worth and in doing so we don’t realize we are diminishing our value!

Net-worth is material and tangible while our self-worth is non-material and intangible. One is measurable in quantitative terms while the other is only ‘felt’ in qualitative terms. One can be stored and accumulated for a rainy day while the other does not need to be stored. One is known when it is acquired and counted while the other can only be known when it is given away i.e. you can only know your self as a source of love when you give your love away. 

And this is why there can never be an expert in self-worth and self-esteem except your self. Only you know your own value but only in the moment when you give of your self selflessly. And paradoxically that’s the moment when you least need to know and feel any value, any worth. That’s the moment when you are not ‘estimating’ your self.

In fact, if the truth be known, just as you cannot love your self, for love is what you are, so too you cannot estimate your self, you cannot ‘value’ your self. The ascribing of value requires a subject and an object and the self cannot be both a subject and object at the same time. Perhaps this is why no one ever succeeds in restoring their self-worth but only continues in a vain with misinformed attempts to do the impossible. Perhaps this is why the self-esteem and self-worth industries just keep on growing. There is no cure for a disease that ultimately does not exist except the realization of its non-existence!

Question: When you sometimes say, “I really value my self”, what is it that you believe you are valuing? 

Reflection: Why might it be impossible to esteem your self?

Action: Say to three people this week, “I hold you in high esteem”, and then reflect and contemplate on what you really meant.

Adapted from Mike George’s article, “What Are YOU Worth?” © 2010

Walking the Meditator’s Path

Meditation is a natural experience of healing. The word ‘meditation’ comes from the Latin mederi, ‘to heal’: the call of spirit to the peace within. Meditation enables us to experience peace, heals us from suffering & stress from daily living and leads us to the ultimate destination of the freedom of our spirit.

Inspirations: Meditation draws together spirit, our conscious; mind, our faculty of creation that shapes our lives; and intellect, our inner eye that turns our inspiration into reality. Realization: Meditation leads us to create inner peace through self-realization and by casting aside our many false identities. Meditation teaches us to contemplate ourselves using our purest thoughts (such as, I am a spirit, and, my original and eternal nature is peace).

Compassion: As our spiritual self-awareness becomes stronger, our ability to discern, to remain calm amid life's turbulence and the capacity for empathy and compassion toward others improves.

Revelation: A simple exercise demonstrates the capacity of meditation for revealing what is true. Bring to mind your name, but do not associate it with yourself. Hold the image of its letters in your mind and speak it silently to yourself. What does it mean? Does it connect with your true identity? By focusing your mind fully on the essence of the word, you experience a fundamental truth: our name has no importance and no true relation to who we are; it is merely a practical convenience.

Expansion: Expanding meditation to whole thoughts, experiences or actions will expand our spiritual awareness; enables us to sense suffering and decency in the world. Detach from sorrow and pain around us to deepen the connection with life. This meditation is of the most practical kind.

Meditation: It is best to find a quiet, empty space. Start with ten or fifteen minutes per day with a guided commentary - a recording by an experienced meditator who can lead you into ‘soul consciousness’; lengthen the time, if you wish when you can comfortably do so without the guided commentary. Soft lighting can help the ambiance. At the end of the session, reflect on your experience, and note how your mood has changed, and how valuable the meditation has been.

The deepest, most empowering form of meditation will gently focus on the self as a spirit that is a point of radiant spiritual light. In this gentle illuminating awareness, we can truly experience our self as the master of every thought and action with inner peace radiating and permeating through everything we do and say.

Along the ‘meditators path’ many have reported an opening to a higher power, a divine power that touches, teaches and transforms.

Action: Take ten minutes each day this week to relax your body, gently concentrate your mind and meditate on two simple thoughts – I am the light of spirit and my true nature is peace.

Adapted from Mike George’s article© 2010, Walking the Meditator's Path.

What Do You Say Near The End Of Their Days?

Perhaps one of the greatest challenges we may face one day (if we haven’t already) is to be with someone who knows they only have a limited time left to live. How do we comfort such a person without suffering our self and identifying our self with this person? For, if we suffer with them, we would need comforting our self and hence cannot offer an authentic comfort to them. We could comfort them with idea underpinning many religious, spiritual philosophies and near or return from death experiences.

Death is the ‘nature’s way’ of allowing all living spices to exist on the Earth. We all have to gracefully surrender to nature, to death that is a doorway to another life, a new chapter; it is the nature’s way of liberating us from pain and transitioning us to a new beginning. It is the cause of celebration, not sorrow. It is the nature’s way of renewing the nature.

The fear of what is going to happen at the time of death is not the fear of unknown but a fear of leaving behind and losing all that was known, owned and held on to, such as our body, property, memories, etc. A wise old saying that goes something like this – if you die before you die then when you die you don’t die! Thus if, all attachment is consciously released before the moment (of death) when the ‘I’ has to say goodbye, then slipping out of the awareness of this past life, moving on from all that was accumulated, is easy and painless and entirely liberating.

Everything happens for a reason and there is benefit in everything, including the time of death. Known arrival of death gives a person a chance to tie up loose ends. It is a window of opportunity to say a loving farewell to everyone and leave the legacy of a memory in everyone’s mind of how to die with grace and dignity, how to move on with love in their heart and light in their eyes. Some people may not be open to seeing this ‘opportunity’ to say sorry, or say good luck, or say goodbye or say I love you.

In the true story of the woman whose husband died and said the first thing when came back to life, “Death is wonderful. No one should fear death!” Almost all of the ‘near death’ and ‘return from death’ experiences, share the same theme that there is a radiant, unconditionally loving light awaiting to embrace and enfold them once the person leaves their mortal coil. But their scepticism may still be too great to hear such stories.

Alternatively, you could simply hold their hand; sit with them in silence as a detached observer giving love to them. It is an invitation for them to join you, then all resistance comes to an end and a quiet acceptance takes its place. A serene and peaceful passing is then much more likely. There may even be a shared moment of joy.

Adapted from Mike George’s article© 2010, What Do You Say Near The End Of Their Days?

Forward Thinking – Another New Beginning!

The old year has gone, a new year has begun. Some make resolutions, others prefer to live now and yet others plan for the future. Powerful thoughts have proved to be effective and by making them your starting point, you can map your life and destiny. To that end, 1) determine which of the following type or types best describe your future inclination; 2) ask 3 people how they see their lives unfolding in the coming year, ask them questions to help them grow their vision and ask them to ask you similar questions to help you grow your vision of your future.

The Worrier

When we worry, we create a fear of unknown. It drains mental energy, distracts us from contentment of the present time and even if the catastrophe may never happen, it does ‘interfere’ with our personal well being and the health of our relationships over time.

The Hoper

Some people look to the future and simply hope for the best. They have not fully realized that their future is in their hands. They are not confident and are likely to see themselves as dependent on external sources.

The Follower

There are those who think within the confines of, and impressed by perceptions and thoughts of others; they are easily influenced and guided by others. Frequently, such people are not able to bring reigns of their thoughts, feeling and life under their control.

The Wanter

These people ‘desire’ their way into the future. Their forward thinking sounds like a laundry list of desires. When such the list of desires is not fulfilled, it brings unhappiness. They have yet to realize that they have the “will power” to get what they want.

The Dreamer

There are those who can be frequently observed drifting into a dream of panacea, “everything is going to be just wonderful”. They are even less inclined to dream to make something happen, their future never unfolds the way they had dreamed.

The Aimer

The goal setter is extremely concerned with controlling how their future unfolds. They will likely break their life down into different areas & set and strategize goals in each one. They are well organized & highly focused but fail to smell roses of achievements.

The Seer

The visionary either knows what lies up ahead or they know whatever they envision for their life is likely to evolve in the most natural way. The visionary forces nothing, least of all thoughts about the future; they have clear awareness of their responsibility.

Adapted from Mike George’s article “Forward Thinking – Another New Beginning!” © 2010

HOLI Celebration

Brahma Baba's Remembrance Day: January 18th

Om Shanti!

New Year's Message From Dadi Janki

Administrative Head of the Brahma Kumaris



Dear Friends,

On the threshold of 2012 we are uncertain about what time may hold for us. Ours is a time in which there are two energies at work: an ascending energy and a descending energy.

We are reminded constantly of the descending energy and its destabilizing effects on the world, increasing feelings of fear, anxiety and hopelessness.

Perhaps less visible, but assuredly more powerful, is the ascending energy. Like new growth below the ground in late winter, ascending energy is working quietly in the hearts and minds of people everywhere, shaping a new story. We see it in the surge of those seeking spiritual truth and in the hundreds of thousands of civil society organizations requesting transparency, authenticity, and a return to values.

We have a choice about which energy we affiliate with, about where we put our support. We make this choice at the level of thought. When we allow anger, greed, or fear into our thoughts, we strengthen the descending energy, and we lose our capacity for generosity and mercy.

When we meet situations with peace, love, and persistent happiness, when we are careful not to say or think anything that would hurt another's heart, we amplify the energy of ascent.

We find these qualities inside of ourselves, as they have always been our true nature. But to find them ready in moments of need, we have to nurture them daily. To make the greatest contribution to the world at this time, keep the fire of goodness alive in your heart and mind. Fill yourself with the energies of peace, love and happiness and let them infuse your every action.

With love
BK Janki

Happy New Year: 2012

Are YOU a Free Spirit?

Our favorite greeting at this time of year is, “Happy New Year!” Looking back, we are likely to see previous new years weren’t that new or happy at all but simply more of the same old sanskar and unhappiness all around! Authentic happiness is irrevocably intertwined with freedom! Freedom comes from change from within and change from within comes by burying our old habits and starting and setting new sanskar in our life. Here are seven of the most common ‘prison bars’ that make up the cell in which we imprison our self to ‘serve out’ the time of our life… unhappily! Identify your prison bars that imprison you and consciously work daily to break them to set yourself truly free for authentic happiness.

BLAMING: We make our self a prisoner of the belief that others are responsible for our present and future predicament. Freedom is restored when we end all blame and take complete responsibility for our thoughts and feelings.

COMPLAINING: We make our self a prisoner of how we believe and therefore think circumstances ‘should be’. Freedom is won when we accept everything as it is and everyone as they are at any and every given moment. If we want to improve things, we must find a happy way to improve them.

CRITICISING: We make our self a prisoner of our ‘idea’ of how others ‘should’ behave. Freedom is regained when we ‘let it be’ and realize that each person is playing their part, dancing their dance, in the musical drama we call life!

ARGUING: We make ourselves prisoners of our own opinions, and the belief that we are ‘right’. Freedom is only attained when we re-affirm the idea that each is entitled to their opinion.

POSSESSING: We make our self prisoners of what we believe we possess. Freedom is achieved only when we mentally ‘let go’ and remember nothing is ‘mine’, thereby changing our relationship with all that we may have gathered in our life.

SELF-LIMITING: We make our self prisoners when we identify with an image of our incapabilities! Freedom is restored when we realize that there is nothing we cannot learn to do if we are prepared to embrace our failures as well as our successes.

WORRYING: We make our self a prisoner of our own fears based on our imaginary speculations about a dark future. Freedom is only possible when we realize that what we think and do today create ‘our tomorrow’.

Now that we know where our authentic happiness lies, shouldn’t our greeting for the New Year be as follows?

Wishing YOU New Freedom Next Year!

The Way to Change

Why can it be so hard to change our self? We’ve made all the attempts; read the books, attended retreat, sought advice …yet nothing changed or changed insignificantly.

A successful chief executive, disillusioned with his life happened to come across an ice cream seller and ordered an ice cream, “Please make me one with everything!”, and handed over his twenty-dollar bill and asked for the change when he picked up his ice cream. At which point the ice cream seller put both his hands together bowed, and replied, “Ah, but all change must come from within!”

It seems obvious that we have to do our own work and change our selves from inside out. Yet we still look around for help to change our self. Reason? We have not yet realized how deeply we need to go within ourselves to empower our self for the necessary change we seek. Changing a habit of action is not enough to change our self. Just as, we must pull the weeds along with the roots to get rid of them permanently, changing how we think, what we feel, how we perceive requires us to go deeply within us and pull out their roots and that requires energy. This energy comes from four daily practices that enable us to access our inner power and innate wisdom to make this change permanently.

Daily Meditation to Access our Inner Power

The practice of meditation gives you access to the core of your being where you always find your inner peace. Meditation is the practice of connecting with the power of your peace in order to remain calm while the world around you prefers chaos and crisis.

Daily Study to Bring Out Inner Wisdom

This is the practice of using your mind and intellect to explore spiritual ideas. This will involve the ‘contemplation’ of the wisdom and insight of others to begin with. We must use those insights as signposts to trigger the ‘realization’ of our own wisdom and insight to demolish the old belief systems.

Daily Application for Learning from Experience

The power of our realization brings change in us. Make those changes practical by recognizing that each relationship is an opportunity to apply our power, our realizations and our new insights without imposing them on others. This enables us to take back conscious control of our own thoughts and feelings from others.

Daily Contribution for Our Consciousness

Our ingrained notion that the purpose and success in life is to acquire and accumulate causes the most personal stress and suffering. Changing our habit of wanting and taking, and freeing our self from the worry and insecurity, is only possible when we consciously seek opportunities every day to give with no expectation of return.

Adapted from Mike George’s article© 2010, The Way to Change.